Love in 2025: Between Perfumed Letters and Left-On-Read Messages

The first time I felt butterflies in my stomach, I was in fifth grade, and he was in eighth. He had no idea I existed, but in my mind, we were having the most thrilling adventures together. I imagined him looking at me, mesmerized, hopelessly in love. It was a naive, pure, intense love—perhaps the most authentic love I’ve ever experienced because it didn’t need validation.

But how do we love now, in 2025? How did love become defined by double-check messages and algorithms that tell us who we match with?

Love Then vs. Love Now

Once upon a time, love was an untouchable passion, hidden letters, an unreachable ideal. People loved beyond logic, beyond any guarantees. Today, love seems like a carefully controlled process, where we try to make sure we’re not wasting our time.

We have checklists for partners, unwritten rules about who should text first and how long to wait after a date.

But does this make us any happier?

The Psychology of Love

Therapists say love is essentially a projection of our inner needs. We seek in a partner what we didn’t receive in childhood or what we believe we lack to feel "whole." That’s why love can become a source of suffering when we mistake genuine affection for a need for validation.

Why We Suffer in Love

Because love touches our most vulnerable parts. When someone rejects us, it’s not just about losing that person—it triggers all the moments from our past when we felt unworthy or unloved. Heartbreak is a mix of longing, helplessness, and the haunting thought that "maybe things could have been different."

Therapists recommend asking ourselves: What part of me is actually hurting? Why do I want this love? What do I believe it will give me?

How We Love in 2025

We are more aware than ever of the importance of self-love. We’ve learned that healthy relationships aren’t about possession but about freedom. That love isn’t about a "soulmate" but about two people choosing each other every day.

Yet, at the same time, we are more confused than ever. We crave deep connections but run when things get complicated. We want good morning texts but don’t want to seem too available.

Maybe love in 2025 means letting go of strategies, fears, and societal expectations. Maybe it means loving like we did in fifth grade—naively, authentically, without expectations. Without the fear of loss, because real love is never truly lost.

If love in the past was a patient wait, a perfumed letter carried by a postman, today it’s a message read in seconds—sometimes left unanswered. The difference between these two worlds? The pace, the lifestyle, and us.

But the emotion remains the same, only expressed differently:

📜 How did a love confession look in the past?"My dearest, Every night, my thoughts run to you, and my heart longs for the warmth of your smile. Nothing brings me more joy than hear.ing your voice, feeling your touch in my dreams, and hoping that one day, perhaps, I will be by your side forever. With endless love, your devoted one."

📱 How does a love confession look today?"You’re cool. Wanna hang out later? 🤔🔥" (And possibly left on "seen" for two hours.)

Never forget: Happiness starts with you. It always has and always will—rooted in how you love yourself and how you allow love to reach you. Maybe we no longer carve initials into tree trunks, but love is still there—in our glances, in our gestures, in the way we choose to stay. We may love differently, but we love the same